In sixty days I will leave my Texas home and travel to Belfast, Northern Ireland to live for six months. Although my husband will be with me, I am leaving behind my cat and my adult children. My son is moving back into the house to keep an eye on things.
Preparation for this journey has been stressful. I am proud to be a Fulbright Distinguished Teacher, but writing a grant is much easier for me to do than planning to live in another country. We had just become empty nesters, and now we have this adventure to plan. My husband Paul and I thought that reorganizing the entire house would be a great way to prepare. We have sorted through and either given away or thrown away many of the belongings we have gathered in our ten short years together. Hard decisions were made.
I am nervous because I still do not have either my visa or my plane ticket. I am nervous because we have had illnesses in our family, and I am certain my leaving will cause everyone to take a downward turn. I am nervous because I have not contacted my mentor, yet I have found that I need to change my focus. I hope she approves.
Before leaving for India, I posted a picture of my daughter, and explained how it represented my feelings at the time - the stress and fear echoing much what I feel now. On the left is a picture I took that I think represents this time more accurately. The moon is out of focus; I am unfocused. It is partially in shadow; I am unsure exactly what I will be doing in Belfast, so I am in the shadows. The moon is in greyscale. I recognize nothing is black and white about the issues I am researching. There are grey areas I must recognize. On the right side there is a sliver of brightness. That is what I am clinging to - the expectation that everything will be alright.
To help regain my footing, I am going to post one blog entry a week until I leave. These posts will be about my journey so far as well as updates on the progress I have made.
Preparation for this journey has been stressful. I am proud to be a Fulbright Distinguished Teacher, but writing a grant is much easier for me to do than planning to live in another country. We had just become empty nesters, and now we have this adventure to plan. My husband Paul and I thought that reorganizing the entire house would be a great way to prepare. We have sorted through and either given away or thrown away many of the belongings we have gathered in our ten short years together. Hard decisions were made.
I am nervous because I still do not have either my visa or my plane ticket. I am nervous because we have had illnesses in our family, and I am certain my leaving will cause everyone to take a downward turn. I am nervous because I have not contacted my mentor, yet I have found that I need to change my focus. I hope she approves.
Before leaving for India, I posted a picture of my daughter, and explained how it represented my feelings at the time - the stress and fear echoing much what I feel now. On the left is a picture I took that I think represents this time more accurately. The moon is out of focus; I am unfocused. It is partially in shadow; I am unsure exactly what I will be doing in Belfast, so I am in the shadows. The moon is in greyscale. I recognize nothing is black and white about the issues I am researching. There are grey areas I must recognize. On the right side there is a sliver of brightness. That is what I am clinging to - the expectation that everything will be alright.
To help regain my footing, I am going to post one blog entry a week until I leave. These posts will be about my journey so far as well as updates on the progress I have made.